Every relationship has its problems. Some are minor and others lead to explosive and hurtful arguments. But learning how to control anger in a relationship can change these explosive arguments from being damaging and hurtful, to being a constructive and positive way to deal with any problems that may arise within the relationship. Anger can be damaging, and having positive ways to express your anger can prevent this damage from occurring. That does not mean there won’t be some angry conversions, nobody is perfect. But awareness is key; if you are aware of different ways of approaching things, you can be conscious of them.
Anger Affects Both Parties
When it comes down to it, anger does not just affect the person who is on the receiving end. Most people who struggle with anger have something going on that leads to this reaction. This is not to justify the behavior, but understanding that the person who is being explosive struggles with self expression can be important in approaching them while they’re behaving angrily.
The person on the receiving end of the angry outburst is also affected. Words can hurt. Learning to control your anger in a relationship can help to prevent further damage to your partner and your relationship. Approaching the situation with less anger and being able to have a constructive conversation about what is going on can not only prevent damage to the person and relationship, but also potentially there could be a positive resolution to the problem that has developed.
Controlling Anger in a Relationship
Understanding that learning how to control anger in a relationship is essential to the success of that relationship is important. There are some guidelines that you can use to be aware of common threads that happen when people get angry.
Avoid the cut off. This simply means that shutting your partner down is not going to help. Many times giving your partner the silent treatment may seem like the best way to avoid the anger. However, this can lead to your partner feeling more anxious and angry. That doesn’t mean that in the heat of the moment you need to immediately solve the problem, but it expresses to your significant other that you need time to cool down.
You can only control yourself. If your partner is upset, give them some time to feel their feelings and process them. You don’t need to immediately make things better. This could potentially lead to the problems worsening. There is also self reflection. If an argument is taking place ask yourself if the differing views on the topic are the problem, or if it is a desire to be “right” or “win” the fight. Maturity in these situations can help you as you learn how to control your anger in a relationship. You have half of the relationship. Being calm and mature when approaching stressful topics of conversation can help your partner do the same.
How Anger Damages a Relationship
Expressing anger in a negative way can wreak havoc on a person and a relationship. This is why it is so important to know how to manage your anger in a relationship. Healthy relationships and built on trust, mutual understanding, communication, and boundaries. Anger can break all of these elements down and it can go from healthy to toxic in a short amount of time. Anger can cause partners to feel unloved and unsafe.
When angry outbursts lead to hurtful and damaging words being spewed at your partner, and then when the situation has calmed down, the anger is used as an excuse for the hurtful words, this can lead to a cycle of verbal abuse. By continuing this cycle, anger will not only damage the relationship, but it will damage your partner. Learning how to control your anger in a relationship can help to prevent this cycle of abuse from occurring. Fortunately, there are resources in South Florida that can help.
Anger Management Therapy Benefits
Anger management therapy can help you if you struggle with knowing how to control your anger in a relationship. If your response is to shut your partner down, scream and yell, or say hurtful things to prevent yourself from hurting, then you could possibly gain some tools from this type of therapy. Learning new approaches and healthy communication skills can only benefit you.
Help for Anger Management in South Florida
The damage that angry outbursts can cause is astounding. It can lead to trauma in both parties, and cause the relationship to end leading to heartbreak. But anger is manageable. If you or a loved one struggle with controlling anger, have frequent outbursts, or have noticeable damage within a relationship caused by anger, there is help. You can learn ways of controlling yourself and constructively addressing issues that may arise. At the Neuroscience Research Institute, our team offers help to those who are under our care to learn new ways of approaching and managing anger.
Contact us today and take the first step toward a better life.